16 Ways to Rekindle Your Self Love

Pink Hearts

Red Lips

Cuddly Bears

Sweet Chocolates

Valentine’s season sure has arrived!

As a decidedly single person I’ve noticed I don’t feel what I once felt around this time - the pressure and anticipation of wanting someone else to show me how much they care about me, either through the size of their wallet or their heart. Though I prefer expression from the heart.

For example, my first Valentine’s Day with my ex husband consisted of him surprising me on my doorstep with gift after gift, including a beautiful fur blanket I had eyed while shopping with him a week prior.

My favorite Valentine’s Day with him included a trip to the city of San Francisco where we ate at Opaque, a restaurant steeped in darkness with blind waiters and plates where you get to guess the ingredients -- because you literally can’t see anything!

Since that relationship proved itself to be toxic, much less dangerous, I have instead created a lifestyle that encourages me to show myself love. As in any relationship, this self appreciation is not limited to Valentine’s Day, nor does it have to be extravagant.

If you are like me and are intentionally single, at least for the foreseeable future, here are a few suggestions, that fit any budget, to keep yourself interested in … well, you:

One Time Date Ideas:

  • Free - Go on a Moonlight Walk/Hike/Rollerblade/Drive, Get lost in your thoughts

  • $ - Can’t go wrong with Dinner & A Movie

  • $$ - A Trip to the Spa

  • $$$ - Shopping Spree!

At Home Ideas:

  • Free - Hand & Foot Massage

  • $ - Research a New Recipe to Cook & Make Yourself a Gourmet Dinner

  • $$ - Order a Subscription Box (SingleSwag, FabFitFun, etc.) & Open With Your Favorite Beverage (Wine, Rum & Coke, Shirley Temple!)

  • $$$ - Take A Friday or Monday Off Work & Plan A Mini Staycation

Long Term Ideas:

  • Free - Set a Fun Long Term Goal & Plan How You’re Going to Accomplish It

  • $ - Learn Something New (Language, Discipline, Religion, etc.)

  • $$ - Design, Plan, and Purchase Your Ideal Wardrobe

  • $$$ - Plan an Extravagant Dream Vacation

Everyday Ideas:

  • Free - Work Long Periods of Rest into your Schedule (At least Monthly)

  • $ - Every Week, Purchase a New Self Care Item & Use it (Lotion, Serum, Polish, etc.)

  • $$ - Visit a New Place Weekly (Restaurant, Lecture, Meetup, Ceremony, etc.)

  • $$$ - If You’re Feeling Especially Lost, Start Seeing a Spiritual Coach, Guru, or Mentor to Get You Back on Track

When we enter in and stay in relationships that aren’t right for us, we begin to lose ourselves. It’s so funny how you’ll notice your life changing after you start falling in love with yourself again and you can start by practicing some of the above examples. Remember, self care has nothing to do with money, it has everything to do with the change it produces in you: an increase in confidence, the ability to set boundaries and say no when necessary, the ability to say yes when necessary, a feeling of self-reliance, and not settling for the ordinary.

I wish you all the best in this journey for yourself, feel free to contact me if you need further help in this area.

Happy Single Awareness Day (Friday, February 15th, 2019)!